She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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