so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Randomize