There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
jump out the window naked night went bad
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