Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
