So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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