I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
