Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
