2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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