we have pet lesbian snakes
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
I'm passing your future prison.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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