So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
