I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
