I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Are my feet made of real feet?
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
