Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
