garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
handjob tips. give me some.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
