ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
