READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
