a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Randomize
