Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize