sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
