so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
