I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
