Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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