he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize