my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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