Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Randomize
