I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He felt like a one man threesome
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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