I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
