White coat. Heels.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Can you bring me the toilet please
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize