'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
