she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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