i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Randomize
