I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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