your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
