weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
