So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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