You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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