are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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