I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
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