You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
