They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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