so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
