yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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