If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Still dying that you shit outside
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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