3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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