And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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