i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
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