She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
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