Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I wish I could teleport
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
