I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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