What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
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