Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
