It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
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